Have you ever heard the statement, “You are what you think.”? Simply put it means just what it says. If you think negative thoughts, you will be negative and vice versa, if you think positive thoughts you will be positive. If you think bad thoughts about yourself you will feel unworthy. The words other people say about you can also affect how you think about yourself and what you say and think about yourself will shape your thought life as well. A parent can build a child up or tear them down as can a spouse or significant other person in your life.

I myself was in an abusive marriage for many years, this person spoke negative and demeaning words to me for several years, he also physically and emotionally abused me. I came to a place of thinking that I did not deserve love or respect. Trauma affected my thoughts about myself which led to PTSD that affected so many areas of my life. I didn’t even know what PTSD was but several events from my childhood and my first marriage carried me into the land of PTSD. In my abuser’s defense, he was broken and needed help too. Really though there are no excuses for abusing another person or child and absolutely nothing justifies abuse in any form.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is a mental health condition that’s caused by an extremely stressful or terrifying event, either being part of it or witnessing it. Symptoms may include flashbacks, nightmares, severe anxiety and uncontrollable thoughts about the event.

I had suffered multiple stressful events that affected my thoughts about myself, not just one stressful event. I was the child of a single mom who conceived me as a result of rape, there was a void in my life of not having a father from my earliest memories. Then there was trauma from an abusive stepfather, who abused my mother as well. Trauma from finding out how I was conceived. As a teen I was faced with a decision that led me to choose an abortion. That was so painful emotionally, I dealt with very negative effects for years after having an abortion. Awful memories, flashbacks of physical and emotional abuse from my first husband. I lived in survivor mode for years.

I overcame PTSD and all the negative things that happened to me by changing my thoughts. The way I survived and overcame all the trauma was to turn to God and ask Him to help me. God helped me through the darkness by shining His truth into my life through His word, the Bible. I began to read what He said about me and believe it with all my heart. I believed he sent Jesus to carry my PTSD to the cross, to pay for my sins and all the sins done against me. I learned to forgive others as God forgave me for denying His existence and doing my own thing, rebellion.

Psalm 139:14 “I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”

John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him will not die but will have everlasting life.”

First, I had to believe that I was created by God and He loves me. This was key and I had to start there. I renewed my mind with what His word says about me. I constantly had to cancel out what my former husband spoke to me and renew my mind with positive truth from God’s word. I also had to cancel out what my own mind said about me, my own thoughts that said I was unworthy of love and shouldn’t have been born. All the negative thoughts were lies from humanity’s enemy. I had to become wise to the fact that there is good and evil in this world and trusting in God and His goodness was my only hope.

John 10:10 “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life and have it to the full.” Jesus direct words to us.

We need only to hear current news to see the reality of evil in this world. What about all the evil that we don’t hear about, child abuse, human trafficking, the results of war on the innocent victims. There is hope that one day God will end the sorrow in this world.

Psalm 62:5 “Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from Him.”

Romans 15:13 “May the God of all hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”

Phillippians 4:6-7 “Do not be anxious about anything but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving present your requests to God and the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”

4:8-9 “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about these things. Whatever you have learned from me, put it into practice, and the God of peace will be with you.”

Believe me that it is a process to change your thoughts, it takes determination and continual practice. God helped me in renewing my mind with His thoughts as I kept my mind focused on truth, not lies. I slowly but surely was able to break free from the destructive relationship, go to nursing school and have a career that supported my children. Through every challenge I placed my hope in the God who loves me most.

Whether you have had an easy life without trauma or are in significant trauma at this very moment, place your hope in God to help you overcome negative thoughts and become who He created you to be, one thought at a time! His word will renew your mind in a powerful way and strengthen you to think good thoughts and take action when needed. He will lead and guide you into all truth, as you seek Him.

In His Love, Sharon Kay